It’s been such a long times since I’ve posted. Mostly it’s because I have nothing new to report. I put off weightloss until after winter because it was too cold to workout in my garage. But Spring is officially here and it’s finally warming up in GA after two snowmageddons.
Anyhoo. So I’m am super awkward at work. In fact, if I were at a job where I could have my own office with a closed door and never have to see or talk to anyone I’d be happy. I guess that’s called home, lol. Right now, I’m a student assistant in Web Development and the meager skills I’ve learned doing this measly little blog are starting to pay off. Only problem is, everyone I work with is much older than I am, like 10+ years older and it’s soooo hard talking to them. That on top of generally not knowing how to talk to people due to my reclusive artist ways and you get a mound of awkward. Plus, I’m new. My boss is ok, she’s like in her 30’s, but there are some ladies here 50+ and they freak me out. I think what bothers me is not knowing when it’s okay for me to do something. Like they were having a get together for a lady’s birthday and I went in just to say hello. I normally wait until someone walks by to speak, because they sit further back in the office than I do, and there’s no reason for me to go back there. Well, I walked in and no one looked particularly interested to see me and I wanted to just wave and say, “I just wanted to say hello.” And they could be like, “Hello, Briana, how was your break? Good? Okay, see you later.” But instead, I got distracted and instead address the woman who’s birthday it was because I hadn’t seen her in a long time. The pause was there for me to say hello to everyone when I first walked in, but I wasted it addressing only her and when I looked up, they were back to talking amongst themselves, and I was back to having no reason to be back there. There was a lady who addressed me (one of the 50 yr olds) and she offered me punch, but that was it. She didn’t ask about my break or my day. She kinda tuned back into to the convo they were already having. I poured up some punch, then I left without saying anything -__-. (<— as you can see by my immature emoticons I’m still very young)
So it was awkward. But I was used to it. I’m not corporate, I’m an artist. I don’t know how to, nor have the patience to make idle boring small talk. I’ll ask about your weekend to be polite, but after that, don’t expect much else :/. I know the boring small talk is necessary if you want to get ahead (my boss was talking a whole part-time position and not a work-study) and I’ve been laid off before for being recluse and unrelatable (almost every job actually), but I feel like it’s harder for me for some reason :/. Oh well, that was my awkward situation for the day.