Welp, school’s out and I’m back to finish what I started last summer.
Last summer, I began this blog to chronicle my journey to perfection, starting with my weight. A journey that was put on hold because of school and want of a social life. Now, while I am working (which I wasn’t before) I still have more free time.
Last year I went from maybe 155-159 lbs down to 140 lbs in about three weeks. Which is crazy right? I did this based on some type of internal “common sense” that I can’t really explain with science, but I dropped a pound a day doing it (letting myself “chill” on weekends). I’m 144 lbs average now (I ate like a pig over the winter, though 4 lbs ain’t that bad). My goal is hopefully around 130 but when I was 170 it was my goal to be 140 so who knows where I’ll be satisfied.
I’m pretty much still doing what I did last year: no food after 4:30 pm; some form of exercise everyday (I dance 4 days a week and run 4 days a week with 1 day of overlap); eat whatever I want but generally stay under 1100 calories (did you know eating fewer calories increases longevity? ok, maybe not that low, but it’s only temporary); and drinking lots of water. I keep it simple and bearable. The only real challenge is ignoring the habit to eat with my family for dinner.
I take caffeine tablets before working out (want a more natural way and thinking of trying bananas) and stalk my “thinspiration” daily to stay motivated. It’s still Kaylin Garcia by the way :), I follow her on Instagram and her picture is my screensaver. While I think we’d never get along in real life, her body is GREAT and close to what I think mine would be at her size.
Unlike last year, I care less about the scale and more about the measurements (since 140 used to be the magic number :P). Last time I checked my waist was either 28″ – 29″ and I want to be 26″ (an average for the girls whose bodies I like). I’m so close! Hopefully, this is the year that I’ll finally accomplish my weight goals. Then I’ll probably move to my skin.
So, thanks for reading and caring about my narcissistic goals in life!
(Oh, and I’ll try for more pictures, pictures are more fun than words lol)
So, I’m 22 going on 23 in July and I still live at home with my parents. I have about $1000 saved in loan money (yeah, I know). I want to move out so bad. I go to school 40 miles away in the city and the 1.5 hour commute (for one way) is hell on my car, my bank account, and my time. I want to live closer to the city and apartments there are about $700 – $800 for a common studio apartment. With a roommate and two bedrooms it’d be about $450 – $500 for each of us (on the lower end). As an art student, it’s vital that I make connections and meet people but I’m stuck in the suburbs with a curfew and a low income.
I know some people might say, ‘you do what you have to do’ and that doesn’t work for me, my car can’t withstand the drive and my bank can’t withstand my car needing any more repairs (it’s 17 years old and I can’t afford a new one).
Now on to this issue. My job (I work as a student assistant at my school in web development doing graphic design) has told me that they will hire me on during the summer as a temp. As such, I’d be making $10/hr 26 hours a week leaving me with $1040 per month which is a decent number (I think) to move out on. But here’s the catch, it’s only for the summer. Once school starts back, they’re putting me back on work study where I’ll be making $8.75/hr up to 20 hrs a week :(.
Originally, they gave me two options. 1) Remain a student assistant over the summer for the aforementioned $8.75/hr up to 20 hrs a week. Or 2) become a temp worker and work at $8.75 for either 3000 hours and/or up to a year (then they would have to let me go for six months). They say that they really value me and want to keep me and it’s the first job that I’ve been able to really be creative. I know that I was only lucky enough that no real graphic designer applied for it.
You hear all the time when you are an art student that you need to find some way to make money while you produce your art. I want to be a comic artist (odd, I know) and realistically I don’t see success there (not without putting in real work). To be honest, I don’t need a “real” job (a 9 to 5, five days a week). The $10/hr 26 hours a week would be great if they’d only keep me at that rate. Then I’d have my time to devote to my passion. I was so depressed looking for jobs last year and going to interview after interview and never getting called back. I ended up stalking the Disney store who finally hired me only to make $7.75/hr.
Other people (friends and classmates) make moving out seem so easy! I don’t know a single person who’s at home (involuntarily). I feel like such an undesired bum! But anyway, my question is whether the deal they settled me with a better one than the previous ( number 2) deal? Any advice on moving out?
My school semester is almost over. And with spring here (if Georgia even has a spring) it’s getting hotter and hotter, my solution to stay comfortable in warm weather is to wear less clothes. I’m currently a student assistant at my school (and have been for different departments since 2011) and clothing has never really been an issue. Between not having to work around my bosses and my general shame towards my body XD it’s just never come up.
But a few times (at most 3) this semester it’s been hot. And when I get hot, I get swamp crotch. This isn’t normally a problem if I’m not outside or moving. But walking from class up and down Atlanta gets VERY hot. So I’ve worn shorts. Thrice. And not just shorts, cutoffs. They aren’t all that short and come to a high school appropriate mid thigh. But apparently, shorts aren’t appropriate for work AT ALL.
Skinny jeans seem to be fine and even my boss wears them (with converse lol, idk if there isn’t really a dress code or what…) I asked at the very beginning when I first got the job (way back in January) if there was a dress code and she said no, as long as it wasn’t offensive. I didn’t know there was an implied “but no cutoff shorts” there. Or shorts period. Because today I mentioned the heat to my boss and said it would be easier if we could were less clothes to work, but that probably wouldn’t go over well. And she said something along the lines of “no shorts” and that was all I heard. I’d noticed her looking at them when I wore them before and even remember thinking, why is she looking at my legs? don’t my shorts pass the finger tip test? Lol, but this isn’t high school. I think for work there’s the dollar bill test, where no more than a dollar bill above the knee.
I guess I thought I could get away with it since I was a lowly student assistant. That’s a pretty bad thing. I should probably always want to impress my superiors 😛 So no more shorts for me. Hopefully since I don’t have summer classes and I’ll be straight in and out of work, it won’t be so bad.
Extra: Also, as for posting (if anyone’s even reading this, let alone consistently) I started this blog as an outlet for fulfilling my personal goals. I know I’ve been mostly obsessed with weight and there are girls’ bodies currently on my page, but it’s about perfection overall. Physically, mentally, socially, and spiritually. I’m just OBSESSED with my outer, which I want to reflect the inner. If that makes sense.