Oh the life of a chronic binger. I always look at people who are morbidly obese, or even more than moderately overweight and wonder “how the hell did they let that happen?” I always look at how I binge on like 3000 calories in a day, still stuffing food into my mouth while I’m full and my stomach hurts. Then I think about how I only do it once or twice a week. I guess that was enough to make me as the BMI calculator states, “slightly overweight,” but wasn’t enough to actually make me obese. Even though, on those days I felt like I should be.
I already know the cause of my bingeing, anxiety. Lately, I’ve been thinking of building a website (not a blog like this one) and it’s something I’ve been thinking really hard about (it’s even been drowning out my dreams). The thought of all the work and research and possible success and possible failure has been eating my brain. I haven’t figured out what I need to do about it yet. I normally settle my anxiety with gum and Candy Crush. But I’m out of gum and Candy Crush has gotten too hard, lol. So, I’ll have to find some other, hopefully productive, way to cope.
Today I had: hash browns, banana pudding, a Clif Bar, a grilled cheese, my brother’s grilled cheese crust, nachos, popcorn, and I’m sure I’m leaving stuff out, all in a 4 hour period 😛